Harley who Farts.... a lot

We have a pretty awesome, farty dog.  This is where Matt would butt in and say "he must take after the lady of the house" & that statement is absolutely 100% false 20% of the time;)

Last night, I went up to our office & Harley, as he frequently does, followed me upstairs to see what I was doing.  He finds me sitting at the desk searching the internet for a yoga class that I have good intentions of going to and all of a sudden comes this huge long fart, sounding very much like a human fart, but from my Harley.  I looked over to him and he is laying down, wagging his tail and looking up at me with his eyes only as if to say "I would tell you it wasn't me but obviously it was...& wow do I feel better".  I tried to hold my laughter in as if I was worried that I would embarrass him if he saw me react, but I simply couldn't hold it in any longer.   Mainly because it was hilarious.   

It was way more funny then when he hot boxes me in the car with a "silent but deadly" one.  That is only funny to me when it happens to Matt!   My mom is probably going to ask me what hot boxing is....well mom, the definition according to the urban dictionary is below.  Just replace the weed with Harley's smelly farts and you will get what I mean:

Hot Boxing per http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=hotbox :

A hotbox is an air-tight room or vehicle that contains one or more pot-smokers smoking one or more joints. The exhaled smoke and the smoke coming from the joint, unable to escape, circulates and thus is breathed in and is not wasted. Smokers in a hotbox may find themselves totally fucked beyond the point of speech after about 30 minutes. Hotboxing is an event that requires some amount of planning, but ensures optimal weed usage.

I hope this post has been a good learning experience for all readers:)  

As it relates to stealing babies, mine are great!  Last weeks 12 week appointment shows that heartbeats are solid and growing like babies should.  I am cutting back on my anti-nausea drugs and feeling good, but really freaking hungry!  Watch out Vegas....I'm going to hit your buffets like the hungry hungry hippo next week.  

Fact or fiction

Here are a few true or false questions along with my commentary for your pleasure!

True or False, morning sickness is called just that because it happens in the morning?  Here's my opinion:  Why the F*&^ do they call it morning sickness....I think it should be called All the M'r F'n GD Day sickness.  Thats what I think!  (sorry mom)

True or False:  With your first pregnancy you can get by in your regular clothes through the first trimester at least.  My response:  Absolutely false unless of course you want to rock muffin top in all of your pants including your leggings.  I bought new leggings that ride low and feel so wonderful that I went back and bought 2 more pairs.  Liz Lange at Target is not usually known for super high quality, but I can't recommend these leggings more.  They are thick enough so you are not showing your panties to the world and they don't let everyone know exactly how much cellulite is really down there.   Plus they are only $16.99!  Downfall?  You can't order them online...available in store only.

True or False:  It is extremely important to make good nutritional choices, especially during the 1st trimester.  My experience:  Well, when nearly any smell makes you feel like hurling, a nice big green salad with a side of more vegetables is for sure top on my list of things to eat.  (That was filled with sarcasm in case you can't tell) ... Personally, I am usually distracted by my constant urge to lay in the fetal position on my couch rather than figure out a healthy meal plan for the day.  Speaking of my dear couch, I am pretty sure I have made a permanent dent in it over the past month all while defining further my "2nd butt".  What is a 2nd butt you say?  It is what has appeared on the back of my thigh below my normal butt.  So not only do I feel like complete S*&^ but I also lack the desire to exercise and make good nutritional choices.  Mambas and lemon drops are a new sacred part of my diet.   Something both my dentist and doctor surely approve ;)

True or False:  Its all totally worth it.......

Of course I think this statement has to be 100% true even though my first apt this morning with my OB nearly scared the shit out of me!!  How many tests can a pregnant lady need???  As it turns out, many.   3 down, about 100 to go!

I like the verdict!

If you can tell by my topic, the waiting resulted in a positive verdict!!   

So here is how it went down:

Thursday AM: Went to Dr for the blood test, I put Matt's # down as the number to call with the results.  Dr said they would call between 2-4. 

I had our nieces working with me that day so I made Matt promise not to tell me the results until I dropped them off around 5.  He got the call a little after 1 from Dr Campbell who had good news.   I think it was torturous for him to keep the news to himself for as long as he did....maybe this was my plan all along....to torture him?!

I called Matt around 5pm and got the news!  I got home an hour later and the look on his face was priceless.  I took a picture of him while he was talking to his parents that night to tell them and his smile was one of the happiest smiles I can ever remember seeing on his face.  I will keep that photo forever! 

I went in on Monday and my numbers are awesome so things are progressing or as I say: "this shit is get'n real".  

On Monday night we went to our friends book launch party.  And very fittingly, I bought the little Toomey(s?) their first book, a joke book :) 

Thanks for all of the prayers, good vibes, crossing of all body parts, etc....you all did a great job!!

xo
Angie

Retrieval & Transfer, now wait

So I have been pretty busy and haven't much felt like writing, but this morning I do and I have a few minutes :)

Retrieval = Good!  11 eggs retrieved!!  I totally forgot going into the retrieval that they put you under for it and I was a little surprised to find out that I am a major light weight, I don't remember that with the other two but I guess I was out instantly.  In the recovery room I think I freaked the nurse out a little bit because she asked me if my heart rate was normally that low and if I am a runner?  No, not a runner and I have no idea if my heart rate is normally that low??  I was fine though but she was so disturbed by my low heart rate she had to turn the screen off - ha!  Now I know I would probably be good in a situation where you have to pretend you are dead.  or maybe I have been watching too many movies....

Back to the eggs & stuff:  Of the 11, 5 became strong embryos so we transferred 2 and froze the other 3 (hopefully we won't need them :)

Transfer = Awesome!  I got to take a valium which I was looking forward to and was the one of the days highlights.  I did somewhat hint to the nurse that I really liked it and "would it help with the anxiety of the 2 week wait?"  She laughed in a "no, you can't have more" kind of way.

Now we are in the waiting period.  I am pretty busy so I think this wait will be significantly easier than the last time with the exception of one thing:

Seriously, pooping sux right now, dang drugs!!  (but not you valium, I really love you) Now I am off to drink some prune juice and to buy about 14 cartons of raspberries!

xoxo

Angie

Shot in the A**

It is officially National Hot Dog Day so here is wishing everybody a wonderful day full of wieners :) 

This round of IVF has gone by much faster than the 1st round....maybe because everything was so new before, but probably because I am way busier with work and it has been so amazingly nice outside!  I literally never want to go inside when the weather is like this so I haven't been.  So here is an update....not sure when I'll get around to the next post so I'll try to give a good prediction of what will happen:

A few hours ago Matt had the pleasure (and by pleasure I mean that he was more nervous that I) of icing my buttox and jabbing a giant needle in it.  Success = no passing out or pants wetting.  And it was a success....for both of us :)

Thursday is the retrieval.  There are 9 mature follicles so we are hoping for up to 9 good eggs :)  Fingers crossed everybody!!  And then the petri dish mixing happens and the eggs get fertilized & boom, we've got embryos!  

Transfering them back into me is the next step on Sunday or Tuesday - this is also the day I get to take a valium which I have learned that I Love!  I'll let you know if it is as good the 2nd time around! 

Funny Story - 1 of many

This morning was my baseline ultrasound (this is the 1st ultrasound which checks me out to ensure I am ready for IVF II)  resulting in 11 follicles in one side and 7 in the other......this doesn't mean much on what is to come but this is what the nurses recorded on my pretty lab chart so it must be of some value to the docs.   Tomorrow I get to start the shots and Matt said "How about for every shot you have to take, I take a shot of Jaegermeister?!"  My thoughts:  I would gladly take a needle shot in the belly over a shot of Jaegermeister - gross.

I have been reminiscing over funny stories of the past and I feel like so many parts of my life have included hilarious events that it would be a shame to forget them so I am going to record and share them with you.


Most recent event:  Kale & Maxyne's reception, June 2014
Location:  Kale's parents acreage in Red Wing, MN
Conditions:  Rain/Sun mixed with many drunken friends, awesome reggae music & best picnic food of the summer

For those of you who don't know Malchow (pronounced male - co), he is Matt's good friend from college and our roommate for the first four years of our marriage.  He is the opposite of dull and I am pretty sure he will be a recurring character you will see in future posts ( I could fill a decent size book with Malchow stories)  Here's a picture of Malchow on the left in usual form:

Well, Malchow now lives in Austin Texas and made the drive up for the big event.  Malchow gets really excited for these fun friend gatherings and usually says or does something memorable.  Although I left around 11-12 that night, I had the pleasure of Malchow's delightful & memorable hug goodbye.  

He said:

"I'm sorry I broke your railing"  This one had me almost on the floor in tears laughing....when Malchow lived with us about 6 years ago, he drunkenly stumbled down the stairs and only managed to stay partially upright at the saving grace of our railing that he nearly ripped out of the wall.  I guess an apology is never too late :)

"I love you guys, you and Toomey, you guys are almost as awesome as Joe & Johnna"  ....OMG, I was Lizzing at this point (Lizzing = laughing so hard you wiz your pants ~ courtesy of Liz Lemon)   This was the icing on the whole night and why I love Malchow so dearly.  He is honest, has no filter after an ounce of booze and his quotes live on forever.   To be clear, Joe & Johnna are pretty awesome & I look forward to the opportunity to let them know regularly that I hope we can be as awesome as they are some day :)

Until the next post, here is a quick vid of the band at the reception.  Enjoy!

Happy Independence Day!

As I write this, Matt is blowing off fireworks in the backyard and drinking an O'douls.  Yep, O'Douls.  We decided to go the non-traditional route and see if we could get Matt pregnant this round instead ;) (BTW: Thank you Joe O'neill for that witty joke)

Ha, but wouldn't that be awesome if Matt got pregnant?!  I just keep picturing Peter Griffin from family guy right now when Lois & Peter swap bodies. I can't get the video to show up on this post right now, so here is the link if you want to get a good laugh in :)
http://youtu.be/-6qS80xZicc

But really, we are gearing up for IVF round 2 and Matt quit drinking adult beverages with me.  He may have done this voluntarily, he may have not.  We really would like this to be our final round so we are giving it our all - no funny business except for other funny business like inappropriate jokes & movies that are far from tasteful.  As always, I love a good recommendation for funny tv or movies so please send my way :)

I hope that your holiday festivities leaves you with all of your fingers and that you have lots of fun!