How a Pregnant Lady (AKA: Me) Almost Got Arrested at Costco

Costco visit #1,973:

I was walking around in good spirits, grabbing the staples before the babies arrive and just picking up my last item, a 6 pack of chicken broth, which just happened to be located behind a guy serving up chicken soup samples.   

 Now, I LOVE the sample workers at Costco, for many reasons but mainly because they usually supply me with a full meal by the time I am through at Costco.   

Well, today I had lunch before I went to Costco and maybe that really pissed off the chicken noodle soup sample guy or maybe he is just an idiot.  But as I walked gracefully with 40-50 lbs of love protruding from my midsection, 

I said:  “Excuse me, I am going to scootch in here and grab some chicken broth if that’s okay” 

And Chicken Noodle Soup Sample Guy responded with:  “I don’t know about scootch, but WADDLE seems more correct” 

And that is where I broke his face.    

Okay, I didn’t really break his face physically, but I did so mentally along with a mental middle finger extended as I briskly walked away. 

So thank you to the Trader Joe’s ladies that told me in the same day that they cannot believe I am having twins any day now (I’m 37 weeks) and thank you to my family and friends who tell me how great I look.  Even if you are all lying, I appreciate it & I am mentally giving you millions of golden kisses =)